What Not To Get Your Shorty For Christmas ~Eazy

^^I'm sure shorty wouldn't be smiling so hard 

if she knew there was nothing more than oven mitts 

and cleaning towels in that box^^

I've been gone for a minute, but we aren't gonna talk about that...lol
I decided to drop this post right before Christmas eve cause everyone knows that real niggas wait till the last minute to get their shopping done...its only right. First, lets just clarify why I used the word "Shorty" instead of Queen or Girlfriend... I believe that if you talking to a girl, really like her, want to take it further, etc... why not get her a lil sumn sumn for the holidays? On the flip side, I also used the word "Shorty" cause you shouldn't be out shopping for a flip you only hit up on weekends after the club let out and you wanna get out your thirst, we call those lay-ups b, very easy to hit and it doesn't take much effort, and since lay-ups don't take much effort, don't waste your money...

First and foremost....

• Aldo Purses: Keep in mind, I had no idea that this was a bad choice until like a week ago. Me and Brey asked this lady in Aldo which one she like best and she responds, "We'll If you actually care about the person you're buying a purse for then you would leave this cheap ass store and go to Coach".... Bitch made me feel like I should be stoned to death for even thinking about committing such a heinous act. And what makes it worse is that we actually went to Coach earlier that day and none of the bags had price tags on em....got me all the way fucked up
• Fake Jewelry: Niggas should know this by now b....but I still see y'all at those kiosks in the mall buying your shorty cubic zirconia earrings or those gold rings that you cant wear in pool water. And the logic behind it is crazy! A nigga really told me, "man look at this ring, she gone think i went to Jared's b"... nah yo, If anyone knows fake jewelry its women...just don't een risk it
• Gym Memberships, etc.. : This is a funny ass gift...but yo if you want your shorty to lose weight/look better you really gotta try more subtle ways to do it. Don't go out and buy her a treadmill and protein shakes for Christmas and expect her to be excited when she open it. A gym membership gift is like saying, baby you gotta till next Christmas to get your act together, get to work. Ladies don't wanna see that lol...avoid all exercise equipment or health care products. Don't go buying your girl a year supply of proactive if she has bumps on her face b lol, girls are too self conscious for that. No weight watchers scales or Wii fit games b
• Cleaning appliances/supplies: Another funny ass gift. I personally don't know anyone who has received this for Christmas but I wouldn't put it past you niggas to go and cop your shorty a better mop, to replace the old one so she can clean better... Dog you really gotta be a grade A dirtball to go out and buy her a vacuum for Christmas cause the rug hasn't looked its best lately, chill with the cleaning supplies
• Pets: Unless you go shopping with her to buy the pet, just avoid this as a gift. As a guy, we not gonna want no pussy as dog or rabbit running through our crib at all times of the night b. We'd go cop a killer pitbull or Cujo or some shit and 9 times outta 10 that's not what she wants, so unless you want to be dropping homie off at the animal shelter the next day, just don't een do it

And last but certainly not least...

• Clothes: Dog...females are the most random creatures on earth...When they buy clothes, they're really isn't any pattern in it whatsoever, they just buy shit. When they go to the mall, they still  buy items to go with outfits they purchased months ago. I know y'all been shopping with a shorty one day and heard her say, "Oh babe these jeans would go perfect with that pink shirt I bought last year".  So unless you some tender feminine ass nigga, there's no reason for you to be in your local Macy's rummaging through females tops your shorty. There's no winning in it, most likely she wont honestly like it, and if she does, and you got her exactly what she wanted, then there are a few questions you should ask yourself. Little things like scarves and gloves, and even lingerie are ok, that's it tho b

So there you have it, I've provided you niggas with ample information on what to stay away from when buying your shorty something this holiday season, so get out there and be great... 

Keep in mind that if you know for fact that your shorty wants a certain gift, but it happens to make an appearance on this list of struggle presents, still get it for her for the simple fact that she wants it... this list applies to niggas who aren't so sure of what to get her....if you taking a stab in the dark, avoid these items b......I'm out
Shouts to @ShesSo_Dramatic for the assist... #heyboo

~Eazy